By Jillian Benedict

Can someone please tell me why we have a caps lock button on our keyboards? Does anyone else find it as annoying as I do? Maybe if I didn’t cheat in typing class, I wouldn’t accidentally hit it as much as I do, but still – is there really a need for someone to type in all capital letters? I mean, I like to yell at someone as much as the next person, but doing so via copy just seems pointless.

By The girl formerly known as Jillian Kule

Yeah, I know. I’ve been MIA. But, I can assure you my absence from blogging has been more than just slackerness. First there was the agency move, then some random festivities, such as revisiting my childhood at a New Kids on the Block concert. But the true reason I’ve been AWOL is because I recently tied the knot with my long-time boyfriend. (I know, “awww!”)

It’s true. I am officially off the market. Sorry, Paul Posluszny. I couldn’t wait for you forever.

So, to make up for my nearly two-month hiatus, here is a list of things about planning a wedding that I discovered:

- Weddings are relatively easy to plan, as long as you don’t have a job and don’t have family members.

- Even the most tightly wound, high-maintenance chick can be cool, calm and collected while planning a wedding.

- Despite the family’s track record, plan on them behaving (for the most part) at the wedding. But anything goes at the rehearsal dinner, including drunks belching in your ear and possibly getting a little on you.

- You can definitely ask for all three of your cake flavors at the reception.

- Make sure your ringbearer wears a belt so his pants don’t fall to his ankles causing him to fall flat on his face as he runs down the aisle. (Don’t worry, it only happened at the rehearsal).

- Limo buses are the bomb.

- Make your DJ play the music you want to hear, instead of the cheesy prom theme-inspired crap.

- I don’t care if you’re celebrating your cat’s birthday, rent a photo booth. You will laugh your you-know-what off when you see everyone’s pictures.

- Tall centerpiece vases can double as beer-chugging apparatuses.

- Goldschläger is a perfectly acceptable shot.

- If your new father-in-law shares the same name as your new husband, he will go to the front desk, get a key to your room and proceed to barge in with five other people.

- When they tell you to get to the airport three hours early for your international honeymoon and your flight leaves at 6 a.m., don’t do it. Airport personnel don’t start working until 4 a.m.